Tuesday

Someone just handed me a mocha, so I'm sitting here staring at it.  I should probably discretely give it to someone else.  Eleven days no coffee, thirteen or fourteen without sugar, and dairy...well, yeah. (There was yogurt in something I ate over the weekend.)

The folk choir started last night.  Hadn't sung, nor used, Finnish in a while, so it was good practice...I am out of practice.  For some reason, it made my forehead tense, I can't even imagine why that would be.  Anyway, we have a gig in two weeks, and there's a singing workshop I think I got talked into going to: someone offered me a ride (it's 3+ hours away, we'll have to leave at 6 am) and someone else offered to pay my registration.  I'll probably go.  (I just have to figure out the food situation.  I don't want to get a bad reaction-of the splitting headache, crampy variety-with a four-hour drive home.  I can eat rice cakes, I guess.) I had just reserved tickets for a new play lab for the same day.  I can change them, I guess.  I'd like to learn some new Finnish music.  Joining this choir has opened a lot of opportunities up.  I've mentioned this before, but because we are the only one in the US (or at least the region) performing this music, we are asked to sing quite a bit.  There are some cool events this year, tentatively.  (Things aren't for sure until they happen.)

Back to all my time being on a schedule again.  Should find a happy medium at some point, but it makes me feel like something is moving forward.

I'm not running from anything, more like filling the time.  Still sometimes it feels like just "busy."  Though if I didn't fill it, I'd probably sit around and watch YouTube clips.  So, yeah.

It's not that I'm lazy, but that I have to care enough.  (I am somewhat burned out.)  If it matters to me, I'll do what it takes to accomplish or pursue something.  Barring knowing what that is right now, I'm biding time until I find it.  Need to find a way to get dance classes back in my budget, and still be able to eat.  I really want to dance...besides walking, it's the only exercise I can imagine enjoying, and it's great for centering and keeping aware of how one moves...keeping up some part of the acting craft.  If you're not in a show, a class, or part of a collective, it's hard to keep the practice going in the downtime. (Plus, attending a dance class would include group work, and spatial awareness with that.  Yeah, I could dance around on my own and I do, but it's not the same.  Dancing in the studio, with other people, adds something to it, breaks the isolation.)  Meisner class was certainly a gift.

My road has diverged...destination unknown.