Thursday, February 6, 2014

How does one conjure "joy"?

Where is "joy" on the spectrum of emotions?  It was suggested I go for joy on one of these last exercises.  (I need to reverse one of these last three as well, go as far down the road as possible, and then reverse the outcome...not sure which one I'll do that with.  I have one exercise and one emotional state in my mind for Sunday, but neither of them are "joyful," at the moment.  They could both be tweaked.  Lord knows I've changed these all until I walk through the door.)  I've tried "celebrating/joy" before, but have not landed it.  I feel like it's quiet, quieter than triumph, deeper than happy. Is it the fleeting sense or the constant one?  Is it the moment when you witness beauty, or when you realize you've won?  In my head, joy feels private, but I think I need to expand my thoughts on that.  A tendency isn't the last word, or the truth even, just a habit formed over time.  Habits can be re-examined.  Broken.  Liberated.

If "happy" is a state of mind, an outlook on life, a choice on one's point-of-view, and "triumph" is allowing yourself to acknowledge a win, even small gains toward something you really want (and the result of allowing yourself to want and commit to something to an end point also the result of an active choice), than "joy" is an unexpected gift, momentary, a fleeting response.  Yeah...how do I conjure that and make it distinct?  Eh...challenges are a good thing.

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