Raw

I feel raw, like people are digging into me.  I want to recoil and crawl into myself, but I can't.  More people have been nice than irritated at me, but the barbs stick, why is that?

Went for a walk, warm sun, ducklings progressing into ducks, settling in to take a nap.   All eleven having survived to this point, the whole family is curled up on the ramp when I pass them on my way back from lunch. The scent of roses rises in the heat, their colors drawing me in like a five-year old to a candy shop.  In the woods, the herons' nests are quiet, the light dappled, the air cool. Over near the greenhouses the giant agave plant readies itself to bloom for the first time in 25 years.  Looks prehistoric. Nearby, passion flowers send forth flowers and scarlet runner beans climb, briefly reminding me that I should plant something.

After, I'm a little calmer, but still irritated (had a stupid tiff with my roommate's boyfriend, who is the extra person living with us; irritated that he was bossing me around.)

Later.  Went to a book reading/signing (Wendy Perron, dancer/choreographer, writer-though I'm not in the dance world, I saw a notice for it, and can relate to what she was saying, in general) at On the Boards.  After, went for a walk.  Passing by the little woodland in front of The Rep, I saw a bird dart into the trees and admired it's flight, wondering what it was.  Turned out to be a cedar waxwing; a (very) small flock was flying around (I counted three).  Surprised by their presence in so urban a setting.  Walked back to OtB for the first night of  the Northwest New Works Festival (studio), actually loved the whole thing.  ilvs strauss was pretty wonderful, and I wanted Sarah Rudinoff's piece to be longer because I enjoyed listening to her talk.  Would like to see it again, an over-generous pour of bourbon, combined with lighting and music choice, made me pass out for part of one of the four pieces, and I'd like to see it...I won't drink (it was probably more the music, though.)  Might be sold out, it's a small venue.  I'm excited to see the rest of the series.

Need to do more character work, in the meantime.  It's late and I have to get up early, ciao.

Can't seem to load pictures, internet hasn't been working right, is not working now.   It would've been of a turtle, and other random stuff.