Easter

Having a surreal time in this roommate search.  On Wednesday, I contacted two ads, on Thursday two people called me and I set up appointments sorta' assuming it had been the houses I had contacted.  Went yesterday.  First was a man who was going to show me two places, ended up showing me one, which wasn't any ad I had answered, but he said it was available.  Nice enough, slightly higher than what I'd like to pay, but might turn in application anyway.  The other one:  Woman called me, name she said sounded like the name of a friend of a friend that was looking, so I have this conversation with her thinking it was this ad I had just answered.  House was up a dirt road on Beacon Hill, ad had been for a quiet part of Capitol Hill, and I thought, "Well, that's an interesting location description."  And I was running late, so I sent a message to the house I thought it was (they must think I'm a nut case.)  The whole time I'm at the house talking to her, I'm racking my brain trying to figure out who this person is and when I contacted her.  Nice enough place, impossible to live in location without a car, too wooded to walk home to after dark.  Maybe I contacted her a few weeks ago?  I have no idea.  It was a disorienting experience.  And it was pouring rain, and I was soaked and feeling like I was coming down with a virus.  Got off of the bus downtown to drop something off at the library and was confused about where I was.  Eventually figured it out, but thought I should just go home and go to bed.  Slept off and on for the next twelve hours.  I feel fine now.

Internet was spotty all week and then down for the past few days.  Finally was able to get someone to repair it today.  And I was panicking, because they cancelled my appointment because I missed the call...not proud of it, but freaking out on the phone sometimes works (partially it was continually getting stuck in the auto thing and then when I got a real person, having them transfer me and then the call hanging up and having to start all over again.  Took half an hour and multiple calls to get through.)  And it did.  It was real.  I need to find somewhere to live, and that's all online now.  Anyway, the man came early, and he was nice, and he fixed it.

It's not the end of the world, but I don't want to be homeless.

And then, the sun is shining.  And it's Easter.  And the music was beautiful, and we mostly got it right in the end.  And everything rises.  And hope remains.  And we can start over.  And we never had to be perfect to be enough.  And we are enough.  And love won.  And love wins.

Happy Easter.