Also

I realize part of why my task was mundane (and I also didn't deal enough with my partner) was because in the bigger scheme of things, that fact that my place was a disaster didn't matter.  It was trivial, the other person it was pinned on was there to see me, not the house.  I didn't need to do it because in essence, I had already won that battle: he already liked me for me, there was nothing to prove.  And I think in the task I chose I was trying to prove that I deserved him.  (It's a liberating idea.  At least for me: I don't have to be someone I'm not.)  I could've better served the purpose by choosing something that would make him happy, or make me happy rather than the absence of shame.  Noted.

My doctor referred me to meet with a hand surgeon.  The thought being that if they can remove tissue overgrowth there might be less pain...it pretty much hurts non-stop now.  Won't do it until the summer, if I do.

Here is the daily from 1/21/14.

Empty Chairs, Jan 21/L Herlevi 2014

Wall, January 21/L Herlevi 2014