Yikes

Trying to come up with a happy circumstance for class tonight.  Need to daydream.

And speaking of commitment problems, someone I think is lovely from afar, just blew a kiss at me when he left the building, not sure what to do with that.  Not sure if it was appropriate (in the setting.)  It's easier to want someone when they aren't paying attention to you...somehow scares the crap out of me when they suddenly do, especially that strongly, out of the blue.  From nothing to 100...slow down!  And then I close up to figure out how I feel, and then they back away, since it seems like I don't care.  I sound like a teenager.  (Or a Sting song.)

Applied for the auditions.  Don't know when I'll hear back.  There is a headshot discount $150 for 25-minute shoot, less than $280, but don't know where I'm going to dig up $150.  It has to be paid in advance, but maybe I can split the payments.

I bought this bird-of-the-day calendar on sale, and the bird today is a dusky flycatcher, and this bird just started hopping around on my window ledge, that might actually be the bird in question.  Super amused by this: the calendar is standing up in front of the window...the whole incident, very cute.  (Yesterday was a roseate spoonbill...no similar luck.  Tomorrow is a macaw.)  I don't think I've ever seen that particular bird on my windowsill before.

Did not go far enough in emotional preparation for task tonight.  I "went with a capillary instead of a vein."  I didn't know how much we were supposed to carry it out beforehand.  Note taken.  This might be one of my roadblocks, and if it is, it's fixable.  I can do more preparation.  Anyway, I'll probably do something similar on Sunday (she also suggested we try terror or justice), I have the emotional task, my partner has the physical one, then we switch on Tuesday.  Also have the song to perform, and the 100 million dollar assignment.  Busy night.  And we need to get in chair work with our partners.  Think this means that I will not go to the 14/48 on Friday.  I'm using a 2/1 comp with my scene partner on Saturday.  Holy moly!

No pictures today.  Nada.  I'm dirty (studio floor), tired, sore (massage-really did a number on my upper back, food intolerance, physical work) and my eye's irritated.  Goodnight.