Devouring tacos

while I  write this. My physical energy level (on a scale of 0-7) would be about a "2," at least, on the last ten blocks home. I walked the last mile or so because I'm so sore that I wanted to try to work some of the lactic acid out of my legs. It'll be worse on Tuesday, which is when I have to go back to class. It's four hours of physical work. The bottoms of my feet are black from the floor, plus at one point I was rolling around on it, so I really need to shower and not just fall over and go to sleep.

Happy. I feel good. I've been pretty centered all weekend for whatever reason (but I'll take it) and that might have helped. It was a nice easing into the work as well, and all the other students seem pretty cool. He seems fair. I know it will get tougher, in fact he said it will get deeper by the third class (Thursday). He mentioned the need to hit the wall again and again until you break through it. I'll have to figure out what that is for me still. I thought I knew at one point, but am not so sure now. Comedy or funny is in the failure and the common experience, or to quote Woody Allen: "Comedy is tragedy plus time."

Realization, about twelve blocks from home: as far as impulse goes, I have them and don't follow through either because I'm 1) being polite; 2) trying not to step on anyone else's toes; or 3) holding back from what I really want for fear of being seen as being too pushy (even when I've known I've earned something, I don't take it.) Lifelong pattern. Would like to break it. I not only sell myself short, I also sell the "sparring" partner short by not giving them my all and not having them push to their limits as well. Sure, there is a time for holding back, but that's not ALL the time.

Attended a travel blessing (for other people) on my way home. I love the idea of being blessed, being accompanied at the onset of a journey. The last time I went on pilgrimage, I received a blessing around day 10 or something, right before that leg of my trip ended. I wasn't expecting it at that point and I was the only pilgrim. We were the two hospitaleros, some people from town, the lone priest and me. I'm sure that I cried, I felt really loved (by strangers, no less.) Anyway, these people, mostly teenagers, are leaving for Africa tomorrow to work at a school and to learn about the culture.

"Be Safe and Well
Peace, Love, Courage"

Traditional farewell (Egyptian, I think) for those leaving on a pilgrimage. May it be life-changing in a good way.

Sometimes the only thing you can do to counteract all the hate, is to put more love into the world, and to continue to work for the betterment of all. It's not by mistake that we are here. Wake up, become who you are meant to be.